whine and cheese (2024 edition)
it's about time for a good old airing of the grievances. while we have ever so much for which to give thanks, sometimes we need the catharsis of enumerating our woes, big and small. (you can read the 2023 edition here.)
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first up, potty training. I buckled down and trained Greta and Cecilia both around age 2 1/2, and it went fairly well (I'm a big fan of waiting until the kid is practically ready to train themselves). Elizabeth turned 2 1/2 near the end of the school year, and logically it seemed like a great time to buckle down -- we wouldn't be driving around to after school sports and activities and we'd have more time at home. I kept waiting for the day when I'd wake up full of excitement and motivation to strip off the diaper and chase a naked toddler around the house. and ... shockingly ... that day never came. then we were preparing for our trip to Seattle in July and it definitely didn't seem like the right time to train just before travel. then August came and we were busy with day trips to fun places around town. meanwhile, Elizabeth had been pooping on the potty on her own for quite some time (which is 75% of the battle for most kids!), so I did think that once we bit the bullet, it would go pretty smoothly. I went ahead and bought two packs of undies (one Bluey, one Paw Patrol, per her request) and kept waiting for the day when inspiration would strike.
one Thursday morning in September, she forced my hand by refusing to put a diaper on after she had gotten changed in the morning. annnnnd we were off. I set the timer on my phone to go off every 30 minutes and then every hour. I didn't shower or change out of PJs that day. none of my planned housework got done. we read a lot of books and sang a lot of songs. she had just started at a new daycare the day prior (more on that later!), so on Friday I sent her to school in pullups. and now, almost a month later, we're still dealing with accidents here and there, but for the most part she's pretty good. she still wears a pull-up at night and sometimes for naps depending on how much I feel like I can deal with wet sheets (the answer is: not that often).
as potty training goes, it's been pretty smooth, BUT I reserve my right to complain about it because it is exhausting and adds just one more thing to the mental checklist (how long has it been since she peed? is she peeing right now in the corner behind me? should I put her in pull-ups for this trip in the car or do we chance it with undies?).
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grocery prices. they're insane, right? I shop sales and do the bulk of the shopping at Aldi, which definitely has better prices than the other chains for most things. I feel like even a small "catch-up" order with produce, milk, bread and snacks (not even ingredients for full blown meals) ends up costing almost $100. it's nuts. I need to keep reminding myself that I'm not going to be able to buy a week's worth of groceries for 6 people in 2024 for the same amount that it cost to feed 2 people in 2012, but that's the number that keeps rattling around in my head.
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hand, foot and mouth. ugh. we got a notice from daycare that the dreaded HFMD was going around, and the very next day Elizabeth complained that her mouth hurt. she had just one tiny blister on the tip of her tongue and otherwise seemed fine. the following afternoon, she was irritable and clingy. no fever, but just was very fussy and didn't sleep well. it then proceeded to spread to Cecilia and Greta. Victoria, Nick and myself never got it, but we had to cancel plans, the girls missed school and catechism class, and (a corollary complaint), we missed the last day at Antney's so now we won't get to taste their delicious ice cream again until spring. we went through a ton of ibuprofen suspension and popsicles and Lysol. poor Cece couldn't talk at all for a while and communicated solely through writing plaintive notes which she would then wave around an inch away from my face. I felt bad for her but also did not wish to get a paper cut on my eye, not to mention the fact that (as I reminded her many a time), I couldn't read the note when it was moving. everybody was just cranky and not their best selves. it was the worst.
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| when Nick saw Cece's first question, he wondered the same thing (he stayed home with all four of them while I went to work on Monday, and somehow they all survived) |
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the very, very broken political system. I'm not even going to go into it here but I just wish that there was a viable political candidate that I actually felt good about supporting. pretty much since I turned 18, I feel like I've been voting for the lesser of two evils, and for the past few political cycles, it's been hard to even determine which is the lesser.
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| spotted in a parking lot the other day. how I wish these two were actually on the ballot! |
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general toddler mayhem. at 15 months and 2 years 10 months, the babies combined have destructive forces of epic proportions. the destruction can be loud: containers of blocks overturned, a box of crayons knocked off the kid's table, board books dumped out of a backpack. sometimes more calamitous, however, is the silent devastation wreaked by a toddler who has snuck into the bathroom if someone didn't properly latch the door (with its childproof knob): toilet paper unspooled onto the floor, or diaper cream smeared all over the cabinet and the child. Elizabeth often spends naptime emptying the dresser of clothes and diapers. she's usually happy to help tidy up as long as we sing "clean up, clean up, everybody everywhere!" jubilantly as we do so. but sometimes it seems pointless to even pick it up when it's just going to be dumped again the next day. and the worst part is that I feel, after ten years of parenting and having 4 kids, that I should know the perfect solution to this. I keep comparing the two of them to Greta and Cece, who never caused this much consistent chaos (one time Greta dumped cornstarch all over the living room, which I'll allow was terrible). but then I have to remind myself the two of them are three years apart, while the babies are 19 months apart, and that makes a difference. also, when Cece was Victoria's age, we were about to move to Rome, where we lived in a tiny apartment with a fraction of the stuff we have now, so there just wasn't as much opportunity for mess-making. and the dynamics are different. when it's just me with the babies, I know that I know that I know that I latched the baby gate to prevent them from wandering upstairs, and that I latched the bathroom door, and closed the "babyproof" latches on the cupboards (which Elizabeth can open). the big kids aren't always so diligent, so then... mayhem.
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| apparently the top of the cupboard is no longer a safe place to store items. |
finally, I leave you with one of the best memes I have come across in a while. everything about it is perfection. (I once read that men biologically are wired to visually scan an environment in a methodical order, whereas women are more likely to be able to view an area and take it all in at once, so they can then quickly locate something specific in that zone. whatever the reason, it is absolutely true that I am often summoned to find something in the refrigerator or the closet. it's the most annoying superpower ever.)
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Your turn: What's yanking your chain these days? Do you have an annoying superpower?
Loved this post!
ReplyDeletePotty training is the worst. Even if it goes quickly it's still SUCH A DRAG. I had one kid that was a breeze and one kid that literally took over a year to poop on the potty after being pee-trained (so yes, I would have to put a new diaper on just for the poop bit which seemed like SUCH A WASTE and such a hassle). Now they both poop on the potty of course, but I hated it. Complain all you like.
Poor Cece, though those notes are too precious. Both my kids have had HFAM. Our daughter had a high fever and vomiting, and our son was COVERED in little sores. It was so, so sad. We have managed to avoid lice and pinkeye so far, and have never had pinworm. I feel like maybe we'll escape unscathed from those common childhood ailments now?
I also had one that took over a year for the poop training, until one magical day we were at the pediatrician for the "3 year old" well check (said child was actually 3 1/2 at the time), pediatrician asked about potty training, I very nonchalantly explained the situation and pediatrician was very matter of fact in saying "still within the realm of normal, here's a few things you could try" and SHE NEVER POOPED HER PANTS AGAIN. It was like she hadn't realized pooping in the potty was the goal and as soon as it was gently implied by the doctor she was on board. Why didn't I make that appointment months sooner?!?
DeleteUgh, hand food and mouth is the absolute worst. So far we have also managed to avoid those other three that you mentioned and yes, I think you're definitely out of the super high danger zone for those!
I was the worst at potty training- I swear my oldest had an accident at every store in town because I'd forget when she last went. So low key, let them lead the way worked for me! Some had easy signals-"my tummy feels funny" and others were very slow ans stealthy. Having them go to preschool forced my hand a few times. So I changed diapers for 23 years?
ReplyDeleteAnd HFMD is the worst - my kids would get it either before or after fifths disease, just to keep things lively.
Glad you weathered that storm!
Slow and stealthy made me laugh! I think all moms get very good at recognizing "the face" which will have me flying off the couch, "Let's go potty, let's go potty!" Oh my goodness, 23 years of diaper changing should get you nominated for sainthood. I estimate I'll have about 9 or 10 years total by the time my youngest is trained (there were two diaper-free years in between Cece and Elizabeth). It's a lot of diapers!
DeleteAgree with all of these whines, and you deserve a glass of wine for dealing with it all. Potty training is terrible, I dragged my feet until they had to be potty trained for preschool and then did it the summer before. My last little guy just stopped wearing pullups to bed at age 7 because I will not deal with pee on a bed and he slept so soundly he wouldn't wake up knowing he needed to go. Just remember this is just a phase (as you have your older girls to remind you). You're fighting the good fight mama!
ReplyDeleteHaha, why thank you, I'll have one! The night time training is definitely not a battle worth fighting because, as you said, so often you just have to wait until they're physiologically ready. Thank God for pullups!! (And even though E is pretty good during the day now, I still put her in a pullup for the babysitter the other day. Fortunately she doesn't seem to be any more likely to have accidents in the pullup than in undies so I don't think it's delaying her at all. Just saves a whole lot of mess and hassle!)
DeleteI'm fairly far removed from these irritating issues and that last meme is dead on, but I remember it all fairly well. When looking thru videos prepping Reg's hs grad party video, I saw so many videos that included completely destroyed, mayhem-styled rooms in the background . . . . and none of us seemed to care. Ha. My current whines include things like a son who will be 24 on Friday and doesn't call his mother enough. A 26 year old son's refusal to address his issues. And never having enough time to carve out time for me to write. There's always a pressing something or other that I need to handle during nap time when I 'should' be writing. Hunting for the bookshelves that I am hoping will solve lots of problems for us was irritating. We bought some . . . now when will Coach use the shelves for our room to organize his corner of binders and PT journals, etc?
ReplyDeleteThe home videos comment made me laugh!! In my own pictures and videos around home in this season, I'm pretty good about zooming WAY in to my subject so you don't see the extent of catastrophe in the background. I swear we do clean and pick up but it all gets undone so fast!
DeleteI can only imagine how the challenges morph with adult kids. I feel like in some senses you do deal with both because you have your daycare kids too, who are more prone to all the little kid disasters, but it's probably a bit different when they all leave at 5 pm ;)